Transfer
by zashaxander
Summary: Kate Beckett transfers to Boston PD; she's had enough of New York. But her new life is complicated when she meets firey competitor for the next detective spot in homicide, Jane Rizzoli.
1. Chapter 1

1

"You're really going?"

Kate looked down at the hallway floor, focusing on a tiny piece of dirt embedded in the welcome mat. Her packed suitcase was beside her. The years that had passed meant nothing, the drunken father in front of her was less than a shadow of the man she'd known, and-

"I can't stay here. I can't stay here any more."

"Kate, I'll do better, we'll make it work-"

"I've lost one of my parents already. I'm not going to stick around and watch while I lose another."

Jim reached out desperately, his whiskey-logged mind causing him to stumble as he tried to embrace his daughter. She stood still, not even offering a hand to help him up. He leaned against the wall, his head in his hands.

"You haven't lost me, Katherine," he said softly. Kate felt her eyes prickle with tears, but she forced them not to fall.

"Call me when you find my dad," she replied. She let herself out of the apartment, dragging her suitcase behind her. It was heavy; she struggled with getting it down the stairs. The transfer had been easy to get; she had been top of her class at the Academy and was well on the way to making detective already. They were sad to see her go, but they understood.

She couldn't live with the ghosts any more.

The bus ride was long and uncomfortable; the seats were lumpy and the air conditioning was broken and the man beside her didn't seem to have discovered deodorant. Kate tried to remind herself why she'd chosen to move in the hottest week of the year.

She stared out of the window at the other cars, wondering about their destinations, the people inside them... She liked thinking about families that weren't broken, families that still loved and supported each other. She scraped a hand back through her hair and tried to ignore the wrenching pain in her chest.

Boston smelled different. Kate checked the address of her apartment. She'd signed all the papers a week ago after her BPD interview.

It was smaller than she remembered. Smaller and a lot less furnished. She thought fleetingly of calling the landlord, but she just didn't care enough. There was a bed, and that was all she cared about. She opened her suitcase to get out her linens and quickly made the bed. Then she opened the window, stripped down to her underwear, and flopped down on the hard mattress. The sunlight shone relentlessly through the curtainless windows; Kate put a pillow over her face and let the traffic noise outside lull her to sleep.

It was dark when she woke up. Her body was stiff from the journey. She picked up the leaflets that had collected inside the door and found the menu for a Chinese restaurant. She called the number and ordered some food, then did 100 press ups while she waited for it to arrive. Her buzzer went. She pulled on a t-shirt then opened the door.

She spread out her mother's case on the table before opening the cartons of food. Perhaps a different apartment, a different city, would give her a different perspective. Perhaps she would find something she had missed before.

She was going to throw out the empty containers, but realised she didn't have any garbage bags. She really needed to go shopping, but there was the whole weekend before work; she would go tomorrow. The containers could stay on the counter for one night.

The bathroom was disgusting. It had before, surely..? Kate sighed. There wasn't anything to clean it with that night; she'd do it tomorrow. She unpacked her case to get at her towels and washbag to shower, gritting her teeth as she stepped into the grimy bathtub.

She slept badly. It might have been the heat or the bad mattress or the journey... but the truth was Kate never slept well. She hadn't had a peaceful night's rest since January 8th, 1999. She was used to it now, though. She got out of bed at a reasonable time to do so and pulled on her running clothes. She even remembered to take enough money to buy a coffee on her way back.

Running was a good way to get to know a place. Kate plugged in her iPod and explored the city, taking in the architecture of the old Boston buildings. It was nice... It had a very different feel from New York. More peaceful, more affluent... New York was too occupied with being central and important. It was _too _big, _too_ busy... Kate tried to tell herself this as her mind wandered back nostalgically to her runs in her home city. Because Boston was her home now, and she was determined to make it work.

She bought a coffee before going back to her apartment, a delicious coffee. She had her credit card with her and after a moment's deliberation she decided to go into a small grocery store and buy garbage bags and things to clean the bathroom with. She hated food shopping, that could wait, but she didn't want to take another shower in that awful room.

It was only about an hour before she had achieved an acceptable standard of cleanliness. All the cockroaches she found were dead... She tried not to think about them too much. She was pleased to discover the porcelain in her bathroom was actually white underneath the yellow grime. She cleaned the kitchen too, on a roll, enjoying having something to do.

She made her way around the whole apartment, but it was small and it wasn't long before there was nothing left to clean. She had her shower, then sighed. She would have to go shopping. Having things to do was better than not, though. She remembered her mother's advice when she'd visited her at college the first time and discovered her pathetic attempts at buying food.

"_Make a list, Katie. You're a good cook, think of some meals that you want to make this week and write down the ingredients you need..."_

Kate took out a pen and paper and tried to follow these instructions, but when she got to the store she didn't manage to buy very much, and she ended up ordering in again that evening. She looked up the number to call in the directory to get the TV connected. She didn't even like TV, but the apartment was so empty and lonely, she thought having it on might help. They said they'd send someone on Monday; she asked if they could come after 5. The conversation only lasted about a minute. Kate tried to be happy that she'd arranged something, but once the strange sounding woman at the other end of the phone had disappeared her apartment was horribly quiet and lonely.

She went back to her room to get changed, deciding she would go to a bar. She didn't want to drink, but at least there would be people to talk to. She couldn't be bothered with dressing up properly; she left her short brown hair in its go-to tousled style and simply switched her t-shirt for a loose white blouse. She left her jeans and sneakers where they were.

The bar she found was actually fairly upmarket. Maybe it was her subconscious... She sat at the bar; the bartender hadn't even noticed her when a young man came over and offered to buy her a drink. He seemed nice. Confident. Kate liked confidence, to an extent. He had a great body, too. She forgot her earlier decision that she didn't want anything alcoholic, and asked for a double vodka and cranberry juice.

Charlie, she learned, was from LA, but he worked for a publishing company and travelled around to meet with writers and editors. It seemed like an interesting way to see the world. Kate kept the discussion of herself to a minimum, simply telling him she was a cop and that she was new to the city.

"If you're new here, you should really come out and see the sights with me," he said.

Kate chuckled. She was on her third drink now. "What sights would those be?" she asked, raising an eyebrow, knowing how he would interpret this. He slid a hand around her waist.

"Well. There are loads of things. But my favourite thing about Boston is it boasts one of the nicest hotels in the world."

"Oh yes?" she asked.

"Yes. And I happen to be staying there."

He was a good kisser. Powerful but not aggressive, strong but attentive. Kate enjoyed herself. She left the hotel as soon as he was asleep, though. It wasn't that there was anything wrong with him. The wrongness was with her. And while it had been fun, while it had taken the edge off her loneliness... Kate couldn't remember the last time anyone but herself had actually made her come.

She got a taxi back to her apartment and finished in her own bed with the unrealistic hope that it might make her sleep better.

It was about an hour before the tears arrived, and alone in the dark, there was nothing she could do to stop them.

On Sunday she went to an art gallery, but she wasn't sure she even saw the pictures any more. Just lines and marks on paper... She remembered when they used to mean something. Then she cleaned, again, even though it wasn't necessary. And then she ran.

Her colleagues said she ran too much. She didn't like to think about it. She didn't like to think about anything. That was why she ran.

She forced herself to at least be in bed, resting, but she still got up hours before she needed to, and got into work hours before she needed to be there, too. She was sick of being on her own, she didn't like her apartment, and she wanted to go to the gym.

It was almost empty – nice, though. Kate went through to the locker room and got changed. She'd collected her uniforms at the desk; the cop on the desk had raised his eyebrows.

"You're keen," he commented with a smirk.

Kate had winked at him. "I like to get in there early," she'd said.

She could hear someone using the punch bag. She taped her hands slowly, hoping they would finish so she didn't have to wait. They didn't, though... She went over to look. A woman. She was surprised. The grunts had been masculine; she'd been expecting a guy. But no. This was definitely a woman, a beautiful, agile, impressive woman.

Jane Rizzoli whipped her head around to see who was watching her.

"I don't know you," she said. Kate smiled.

"I don't know anyone. I'm Kate Beckett, it's my first day."

Jane kept her face blank of emotion. "Jane Rizzoli. Are you waiting for the bag?"

Kate was about to say yes, but she had a better idea.

"What about some real life practice?"

Jane grinned at this. "You don't know what you're getting yourself into."

Kate laughed. "Neither do you."

Jane sauntered over to the sparring mat, tying her dark wiry curls back behind her head. She looked the new girl up and down.

They were about the same height and build; Kate was wearing yoga pants that hugged her beautifully toned legs and a purple sports bra. Yes, purple. Jane wore black shorts and a gray BPD t-shirt. She threw the first punch.

To her surprise, Kate dodged her fist entirely and somehow ended up behind her. The smirk disappeared from her face and they fought with increasing intensity.

It took Kate 5 minutes have Jane pinned to the floor. Jane looked up at the woman straddling her; Kate winked.

"Pleasure to meet you," Kate said cheerfully.

"Yeah, pleasure... What unit did you say you were assigned to?"

"I didn't. But, homicide."

Jane gritted her teeth. This kind of competition was not what she needed.

"And you're from Manhattan."

"You can tell from the accent, huh?"

"Just a bit. You might want to work on that."

Kate got up off Jane and offered her hand; Jane got up without it.

"So you're in homicide too?" Kate asked.

"Yeah."

"And you must be from Boston."

"Just like everyone else here. Except you. Why _are _you here?"

"I moved," Kate said shortly.

Jane rolled her eyes as Kate walked out of the room.

Kate showered quickly and put on her uniform. She bumped into Jane again in the locker room as she was fastening her shirt; Jane had another chance to admire her abs.

"How did you learn to fight like that?" Jane asked, surprising herself with her own curiosity.

"I had a lot of time to practise..." Kate trailed off. She seemed to be thinking about something. Jane decided not to interrupt, thinking instead about how she could beat her in their next fight.

"I gotta go see the chief," Kate said abruptly, hurrying out of the room. Jane went up to the office. The detectives were already there. Korsak was waiting for her. She strapped on her gun.

"Why didn't you tell me there was someone joining the team?" she asked angrily. Korsak looked a little uncomfortable.

"I didn't think you'd like it..."

"She's going to beat me to detective," Jane muttered.

"No she isn't. Not necessarily."

"Then why was she assigned to homicide already? She's not a detective-"

"Neither are you."

"But I'm-"

"Special. I know. And so is she. She was top of her class at the New York academy, she's a real high flier, fantastic record."

"So she is going to beat me."

"You're just as good as she is. Maybe some healthy competition will be good for you."

"You could have warned me."

"You would have complained."

"No-"

Jane was interrupted by Kate coming through the door. She had her badge and gun strapped to her belt.

Korsak went over to her.

"Vince Korsak. Nice to meet you."

"Beckett."

"And you've met Rizzoli?"

"Yeah."

"You'll be joining us. We don't have anything new right now so you can get started on some cold cases."

Kate sat down at the empty desk. Jane sat opposite her, immediately transferring half her pile of cases to Kate.

"I hate these damn things," she said. Kate turned to Korsak.

"You gonna squeal on me?" Jane asked threateningly. Kate turned back to the cases. She made her way through the pile, making sure nothing had been missed. It was dull work, but it was important.

Jane left to go to the bathroom. Perhaps Kate wouldn't be much trouble after all. She seemed like a pushover-

She felt herself being slammed into the bathroom wall. Kate's face was an inch from hers.

"Every case in those piles, every victim that seems to mean nothing to you, that's someone's mother, father, son, daughter – so we do half each. Because none of them deserve to be pushed to the bottom of a bigger pile. Got it?"

Jane said nothing. Kate shoved her hard against the wall.

"Fine," Jane muttered. Kate let her go.

She waited until she was safely locked in a cubicle before she crumbled, hyperventilating, leaning against the wall so she didn't collapse onto the floor.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for reading, more soon, please review!


	2. Chapter 2

2

They barely spoke for the whole week. They picked up a case but it was pretty cut and dried, they had the perp locked up by Friday morning and the paperwork mostly done by the evening. They were a little late though; Jane and Kate found themselves getting changed alone in the locker room. Jane bit her lip. She didn't really want to ask, but...

"We'll all be going to the bar across the street now, since the case is over. Do you want to come?"

Kate wished she didn't feel so relieved at being asked. "Thanks, yeah, I'll come along."

Jane was surprised. "I thought you'd have some fancy boyfriend to get back to," she said as she pulled on her t-shirt.

"No, no boyfriend," Kate replied. "What about you?"

"Look, just because I took pity on you and asked you to the bar doesn't mean we're friends."

"Right."

Kate sighed. She didn't even know if she particularly wanted Jane to be her friend, but she didn't known anyone in Boston apart from her colleagues, and she had to admit she would have liked to get along a bit better with them.

"Don't look so damn miserable," Jane said gruffly. "Come on, I'll buy you a beer."

Kate narrowed her eyes and followed Jane out of the room, the strap of her bag digging in to her shoulder. She hadn't dressed to go out; she wore jeans and a tank top. She'd had her leather jacket on in the morning but it was too hot now.

Jane liked the outfit – it was similar to what she was wearing. She liked Kate's bra, too, though that was nothing like what she had on. She could see the straps because of the nature of Kate's top, they were red and lacy...

Kate slid into the booth Jane gestured too. They'd ended up on their own, all the guys were talking and neither of them had been particularly interested. Kate was surprised – Jane usually seemed to be one of the guys; it was unusual for her to choose to be separate.

"So how are you finding Boston?" Jane asked, putting down a bottle of beer in front of her. Kate sipped it as Jane chugged half of hers.

"It's... different," Kate said.

The truth was she hated it. It wasn't that it was a bad place, it wasn't that the team at BPD was bad to work with, it was just... She was lonely. New York was lonely too, but New York was also home. Well, it had been. Kate knew deep down that the misery came from within, and she would be miserable anywhere. But being in a new city made her feel so isolated... She hadn't been touched, at all, since that night with Charlie. It had only been a week but already her body ached, she didn't know what to with herself, she just...

"You seem to be thinking a lot more than you're saying," Jane commented wryly. "Don't you miss New York?"

"I do miss it. But I don't regret coming here. I like the team and everything."

"Seriously, Beckett?"

"Seriously. It's good."

"Your team in New York must have sucked."

"No, I just... I needed to get away."

"Bad break up?"

"My mother died," Kate said shortly.

"Oh."

Jane didn't really have a response.

"I'm sorry," she said, too late, but Kate hardly seemed to hear her.

"It was a while ago, but..."

"It's okay," Jane said, reaching out and taking Kate's hand without really thinking about it.

Kate looked up from staring at her knees and met Jane's eyes. To her amazement, the dark brown eyes that locked with hers held compassion, but also-

"Wanna get out of here?" Jane asked.

"Like hell I do," Kate said, shooting out of the booth. She downed the rest of her beer, Jane's hand still gripping hers.

Jane's place was closer.

"It's nice," Kate commented when Jane unlocked the door.

"I know," Jane said, sliding her hand under Kate's top. "But we don't have to talk."

This was the nicest thing anyone had said to Kate in months. She didn't want to talk, she just wanted-

She moaned quietly as Jane's lips touched hers, tasting the beer on her tongue as Jane's clever fingers unfastened her pants. They shuffled to the bedroom but to Kate's surprise, Jane pushed her against the wall instead of down onto the bed. Kate found the echo of what she had done to Jane a week before interesting, but after a few minutes of frenzied kissing and undressing, she wanted to be in control again. She guided Jane firmly towards the bed. Most of their clothes were gone already, she just needed to pull of Jane's sports bra before they could be properly skin to skin.

Kate rolled her hips as Jane lifted her pelvis to be closer to her; their breasts rubbed together as their mouths continued to battle for dominance.

Jane, pinned between Kate's thighs, slipped her finger into Kate's panties (they were red and lacy, they matched her bra) and wasted no time in finding her centre. Kate gasped at the contact, her back arching involuntarily as Jane smiled into her mouth.

Kate moved her hands down to Jane's ass, pulling her up so her hand was pressed between them. Jane flexed her hips to produce another hum of pleasure from Kate, then sat up, changing the angle and exerting more power over her companion. She moved her kisses down from Kate's lips and took one of Kate's breasts in her mouth, sucking hard as her right hand continued its work. She worked her left into Kate's hair, her kisses moving higher again as she pulled Kate's head back and almost attacked her neck, biting the flesh before caressing it with her tongue.

Kate coiled tighter and tighter; Jane pushed four fingers inside her, keeping her thumb on Kate's clit as Kate let out another unintelligible sound.

Kate bit her lip, her hands grasping at any part of Jane's smooth skin that she could reach. She rolled her hips and the friction her movement produced sent her over the edge; Jane held her until the last waves of orgasm had surged through her. Breathing heavily, Kate let Jane guide her down onto the bed. She held up a finger.

"Give me a minute and I'll be right with you," she managed to say. Jane chuckled.

"Don't worry, I got it covered," she said, lying down as well and finding her own centre with her finger. Kate didn't know what to think, but she was too out of it to react quickly enough – watching Kate had brought Jane so close already that she hardly needed to move before she found her release.

Kate moved to leave; they weren't even touching, just lying side by side in the bed.

"You don't have to go, Beckett. I won't make you breakfast in the morning, but I don't mind if you sleep here."

She jumped. She'd been sure Jane was asleep. And now she had a dilemma. Should she stay, accept the kindness she'd been offered? Or should she go? Attachment was dangerous... But even the closeness to someone, listening to her breathe, feeling her warmth in the darkness... Kate lay back down and covered herself with the sheet. She couldn't see because of the dark, but Jane smiled at her.

Kate was woken up, _woken up_, by Jane bustling around the room.

"Good morning," Jane said with a smile. "You slept well."

Kate blinked at her as she sat up. She was completely naked, the sheet had slipped off her. She pulled it up, embarrassed.

"Yeah, I did," she said happily.

"It's that big a deal?" Jane asked.

Kate shrugged, trying to wake up a bit more. "I don't usually sleep so well."

Jane handed her a cup of coffee.

"Drink up. Then I'm afraid you have to get going. I don't mean to kick you out but my little brother's coming over."

Kate didn't need to be told twice. She got out of bed, letting the sheet fall as she realised how silly she'd look trying to keep it wrapped around her. She set the coffee down and looked around for her clothes. Jane handed her a pair of panties.

"Here. Yours are kind of-"

"Thanks."

"It's a shame. I liked them."

"Me too. But I have more."

Jane grinned. Kate put on her shirt and jeans, then sipped her coffee. She shrugged into her jacket and stepped into her shoes. She went for the door, picking up her bag on the way, but Jane stopped her.

"Sorry," she said, meaning it. "I wouldn't mind if you stayed, normally."

Kate just winked at her. "Don't worry about it Rizzoli. I've got things to do anyway." Then she bit her lip in a tantalising manner and sauntered out of the door.

"Damn," Jane said under her breath. She went back through to her room to finish Kate's coffee, and spied something red under her bed. She pulled out Kate's bra and chuckled, then put it in her laundry basket and went through to the kitchen to make some food for Frankie.

Kate was still in shock. She'd slept, she'd actually slept. She checked the time on her phone – it was after 10! She bought a coffee and a bear claw on her way home, discovering in the daylight that Jane's apartment was only a ten minute walk from hers, which was an interesting revelation.

She hadn't exactly lied about having things to do. She flicked on the TV and flopped down to watch it. So what if her things to do were daytime television and push ups?

Kate had always been confident, but her call to Jane that evening was probably taking it to a new level.

"Rizzoli," Jane answered on the second ring.

"Hey."

"Beckett?" Jane sounded pleased. Kate grinned.

"Rizzoli, we have unfinished business."

"We do?"

"Yes. At least, I think we do."

"I'm listening..."

"Do you want to come over tonight?"

Jane paused. It would be overdoing it to say yes instantly. She managed two seconds. "Yes."

"Good."

Kate ended the call and texted Jane her address, then got into the shower. Her buzzer went before she was even out of it. She laughed and wrapped herself in a towel before answering the door.

"You came quickly," she said. Jane smirked, seeing a joke and avoiding her own embarrassment.

"You're not wearing anything."

Kate shrugged. "What I was planning to do doesn't really require clothes. Are you going to stand there all night, or do you want to come in?"

Jane entered the apartment. It wasn't bad. Kate had been working on it all week, adding little trinkets, cleaning... She even had a plant.

The tension between them was electric. Kate led Jane through to the bedroom; they were kissing and Kate's towel was on the floor before either of them really knew what was happening. Kate yanked at Jane's pants and pushed her down so she was sitting on the edge of the bed, then knelt down between her knees. The mattress creaked as Jane leaned back.

"God, woman, you really need to buy a better mattress-" Jane began, but suddenly found herself incapable of speaking as Kate's tongue slipped between her folds.

When they were finally 'even', Kate got up on the bed. She groaned as she lay down on the hard surface.

"You're right, I really do need to get one," she said, as if nothing had happened in the last fifteen minutes. Jane opened her eyes; Kate leaned across to kiss her and they melted together again.

"Come and sleep at mine," Jane suggested as she pulled her clothes on again.

Kate just stretched out in bed, her eyes closed.

"Not tonight," she replied sleepily. Jane laughed.

"I'm just taking pity on you because of that mattress."

Kate hoped Jane didn't mind that she'd turned down the offer. She'd only done it out of self preservation. She'd slept too well in Jane's bed; she couldn't get used to that. She didn't know what this was, but it was definitely to do with mutual need and desire, rather than anything akin to a relationship. Kate didn't want to either give or get the wrong idea, so she would stay in her own bed.

"Suit yourself," Jane said, leaning down to kiss Kate. Kate returned the kiss with so much intensity that Jane was tempted to get back into bed with her, tortuous mattress and all, but she forced herself to leave the room.

"Bye," Kate called. Jane grinned as she let herself out.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for reading and for your interest so far - totally spoiling you with a second chapter the same day! I hope you liked it, please review! x


	3. Chapter 3

3

Kate wished she could say that she slept as well alone as she had beside Jane, but she came into work on Monday morning far from refreshed. She'd resorted to watching bad TV for most of the night and when she traipsed into the cloakroom an hour early she almost didn't notice that Jane was there too. And when she did, she was in for another shock.

Jane saw Kate coming and deliberately slowed down with her shirt so Kate could see the red lacy bra she was wearing. Kate raised her eyebrows.

"I knew I forgot something," she said. Jane chuckled.

"Want it back?"

Kate considered this as she began to get changed. "I kinda like it on you," she said eventually. "Tell you what. Go fetch me a coffee and you can keep it."

Jane laughed louder and left the room, now fully dressed in her uniform. She came back with two cups of steaming black liquid. Kate swallowed hers down. It tasted vile, but it did the job. Jane grinned at her expression.

"Don't tell me, you're one of those posh Manhattan girls who needs cream and sugar?"

Kate blushed. She actually liked vanilla in it as well. Jane winked.

"Don't worry. I like it. Just like I like your underwear. You got dressed too quickly, though."

"If you're looking for a show I actually charge for those," Kate quipped.

"Oh I bet you do. You know, we still have 45 minutes before we need to work."

"There's a lot you can do in 45 minutes..."

"Indeed..." Jane moved in close, untucking Kate's shirt.

"Like solve cases," Kate said, pushing her away, but not quite fast enough.

"I almost believe you mean that," Jane said, but she left the room. Kate followed her up to the office; they signed in and got to work. They talked a little, but when Korsak came in Jane stopped speaking and her friendly expression disappeared. It was a good thing; Kate knew they needed to be discreet. And while relationships were allowed if you got permission, that wasn't what either of them wanted.

The day still passed too slowly, though. They hadn't picked up a new case yet, and while Kate really did understand Jane's apparent coldness towards her, she couldn't help feeling lonely. She'd work her way in, she knew these things took time, but... She wished she had a friend as well as someone to fuck, and she'd thought she might have that, but now-

"Beckett?"

"Rizzoli! Sorry..."

"You were miles away. Look, we're nearly done for the day and I have to go to my mother's for dinner but I was wondering if you'd like to come? Strictly as a friend, of course, but since you're new to the city I thought you might like being around a family..." Jane became increasingly more flustered throughout this short speech, despite the huge smile that spread across Kate's face.

"I'd love to," Kate said quietly, feeling rather guilty for doubting their friendship before. Jane smiled, very relieved her offer hadn't been turned down.

"I'll drive you."

They walked down to the cloakroom together.

"Thanks," Kate said, trying to put all her complex feelings of warmth and gratitude into the one small word. Jane nodded, pulling off her clothes and going for the showers. They didn't say anything else, they hardly even looked at each other, as they washed and got changed. They didn't talk in the car either, but the silence was fairly companionable. The air between them was filled with a mixture of desire, uncertainty, and a hint of kindness.

Jane didn't really know how to be kind. She was always brusque, she didn't have friends... She was good at working with men. The interactions there were easy – a bit of flirting, flash them a smile, and you'd get what you wanted. Things with a woman, even a woman you weren't sleeping with, were much more complicated. And sex didn't make them less so – sleeping with Kate didn't make their relationship like one she'd have with a man. In fact, it was kind of the opposite... They had an unavoidable connection on an emotional level, but they were both still determined to avoid it. This couldn't go on forever, they both knew it... They had to at least be friends as well. But Jane wasn't sure where to start.

Her invitation had been abrupt and completely not thought through. At least she'd remembered to call her mother to warn her she was bringing someone, but even so... She hoped Kate wouldn't get the wrong idea. Not that she knew what the right idea was.

Kate looked around with interest as Jane pulled up in front of a small, neat house in a small, neat neighbourhood. There was a well kept yard, a plumber's van in the drive, and window boxes. Window boxes. Kate didn't think she'd ever been in a house with window boxes. There was also a basketball hoop attached to the garage, above the door. Kate grinned.

"You play?" she asked Jane. It was the first thing either of them had said in over half an hour. Jane followed Kate's gaze to the hoop.

"Yeah. And I'd kick your ass," she added.

Kate rolled her eyes. "You just keep telling yourself that," she said.

"Oh yeah," Jane said. "My brother Frankie'll be here. He's totally harmless, but he'll look at your boobs."

"No problem."

"Not to you maybe, but I won't like it."

Kate got out of the car, the heat almost knocking her back into it. She'd forgotten how well air conditioning worked. The temperature wasn't much better in the house, but at least they were in the shade. Angela Rizzoli greeted them in the hallway.

"Janey! It's so good to see you," she said, sweeping her daughter into a hug. Then she turned to Kate.

"And you must be her friend. I'm so pleased someone's finally seen past her mean exterior. It's all for show, you know. A defence mechanism."

Kate held out her hand to introduce herself but Angela pulled her into a hug as well.

"Let her go before you suffocate her," Jane muttered.

"It's okay, _Janey_," Kate said when Angela finally released her. As soon as her mother had left the room Jane pinned Kate against the wall.

"Call me that again and I'll-"

"Hey, Janey, is this a friend or have you brought work home with you?"

Jane let Kate go. Kate laughed and held out her hand to the young man who was, as she'd been warned, staring at her chest.

"Hi, you must be Frankie. I'm Kate, Jane's friend from work."

"Wow, you must be lonely," Frankie said, shaking her hand enthusiastically.

"Kids," Angela called from the kitchen. The three trooped through to help her. Kate was the most useful, chopping vegetables for a salad.

"It smells amazing," she said honestly as Jane chased Frankie around the table, trying to swat him with a dishcloth.

"It's just lasagne," Angela said, flattered.

"No one in my family really cooks."

"Oh, not even your mom?"

Jane looked up; Frankie grabbed her around the waist but she didn't even struggle. Kate seemed fine, though.

"My mom died. But even when she was around she didn't cook much – she was a lawyer, she was always busy."

"Well you're welcome to come here and eat a home cooked meal any time you want. Janey does. She even gets me to make her lunches sometimes, for her to take to work."

Kate grinned, looking over her shoulder at Jane.

"That's very sweet."

"Well I don't want her to go hungry. She's skinny as it is – both of you are. You need feeding up!"

With that, she bent down to take the lasagne out of the oven. Kate took the salad bowl to the table, which Jane and Frankie had put plates and cutlery on. Frank Sr appeared from the basement; he went over to wash his oily hands in the kitchen sink.

"Nice to see you Janey," he said absently, not even noticing the new face at the table. Angela rolled her eyes.

"When he's thinking about his work he hardly notices me. Frank, this is Kate, a friend of Jane's from work."

"Jane has a friend?" Frank teased, catching his son's eye.

"I know, we were all shocked," Jane muttered. Kate kicked her under the table. Jane kicked her back harder. Frankie looked over at Kate.

"So how do you like Boston?"

"I've only been here a week, but it seems... nice."

Angela laughed. "It's okay not to like it honey, it must seem weird compared to New York."

Kate smiled. "No, no, I do like it. And everyone's been really friendly. It's so kind of you to give me dinner, and it really is delicious."

"Thank you, and it's no trouble at all. As I said, you're welcome any time."

"Because she has nothing better to do than eat here," Jane said quietly. Kate was surprised at how different Jane was with her family, but she supposed she would be just as weird if her dad were around.

"What made you want to be a cop?" Angela asked.

"I... It just seemed like my calling. I was actually in college studying pre-law at first, but I dropped out. I wanted to be more hands on. What about you, Jane?"

Jane seemed shocked at being addressed. "I dunno... I mean, not everyone can afford college. And I didn't want to be a plumber. Plus, cops get guns."

Kate blushed. She hadn't thought about money at all, but now she thought she must seem terribly rich and spoiled.

"Well it suits you," she said to Jane. "You're a great cop."

"You too," Jane said, smiling to let Kate know she wasn't offended. Kate felt a hand on her knee and wondered if this fell under friend or fuckbuddy, or somewhere in the scary territory in between.

They left a few hours later, after almost tearful goodbyes on Angela's part, and promises from both Kate and Jane that they would return soon.

"You're good at families," Jane commented in the car.

"Really?" Kate asked, surprised. "I thought I barely made it without upsetting everyone."

"No! You're definitely a 'people person'. You should come with me every time I have to eat with them."

The suggestion slipped out before Jane could stop it; Kate wasn't sure if she was joking or not.

"You're quieter, with them."

"I learned to be. I don't think they really wanted a daughter, or not one like me. My mom wanted a girly girl, but I'm not that, and my dad's only interested in the boys."

"Don't say that. It's clear they love you. And brothers? Who else is there?"

"Oh, yeah, Tommy... He's the youngest. And he's... well you're going to find out sometime anyway. He's in prison."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. He deserves it. And they still love him more than me."

Kate bit her lip. She didn't know what to say. It was true that at the Rizzoli's house Jane had been snapped at while she and Frankie had been fawned over, but she had no idea what it was like to be a sibling, and her instincts just told her that parents loved all their children equally. Jane realised Kate was kind of stuck.

"Don't worry about it, Beckett. I'm lucky to have them, really. Your place or mine?"

Kate hadn't even thought about it.

"I don't have anything with me-"

"We'll swing by yours in the morning. Come on. You need a good night's sleep."

"And I'll get that at your place?"

Jane chuckled. "Touché. But I think I can promise a good night."

Kate laughed. "Your place, then."

"I'm taking you mattress shopping at the weekend. No excuses."

Kate rolled her eyes. "Fine."

* * *

A/N: Thanks so much for reading and all the great feedback. If you like it and you have the chance, please share with others who might be interested! Love ya, please review x


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I would like more feedback please!

* * *

4

Kate got out of bed; Jane was sleeping. She pulled on her vest and panties and padded to the bathroom, looking in the medicine cabinet, on the hunt for a spare toothbrush. She didn't find one so she used Jane's, scrubbing away with the discount toothpaste. When she was done she looked at herself in the mirror, tucking her hair behind her ear, thinking. It was growing, she quite liked it. Less spiky, more gentle and wavy. She wondered if people would see Jane as the butch and her as the femme, then rolled her eyes at the bizarre definitions. The point of being with a woman was that you didn't want to be with a man...

She found herself exploring Jane's bathroom further, and then the rest of her apartment. It was clean and surprisingly tidy, though Jane didn't have much... stuff. Kate had even less, of course, but she had just moved. She liked stuff, things she collected on holidays or daytrips, things she just found, things that meant something... Jane didn't even have pictures on the walls. It was a nice place, but anyone could live here. It didn't have personality. Kate wondered what Jane hid underneath it, but opening cupboards didn't help her to find out. There were pots and pans, cleaning supplies... Her bookshelf was as ordinary as they come, a few bestsellers, a dictionary, a crime novel or two... Kate thought of her own collection of books back in New York, a veritable library of detective and horror stories from Sherlock Holmes to Stephen King's novels. She missed it.

Jane had a large television and a games console. Kate investigated it with interest – she'd only played a video game once, at a friend's house. She couldn't see the point; real life was so much more interesting. But Jane had a football game and several war type things. She also had tomb raider. Kate considered starting it up and playing; Lara Croft fascinated her. But she'd save it for another time.

There was a DVD player but she didn't have any DVDs. Kate spied the card to a video rental store. She continued to look around, enjoying playing detective. A cupboard stored a punch bag and a fold away spinning machine. Still nothing very personal... Kate looked in drawers now, hoping to find a photograph album, but she didn't see anything. Some people didn't like photographs, she supposed, but it was strange not to have a single one. There was nothing alive in the apartment aside from a small cactus. Its pot still had the label on.

And that was it. Maybe the bedroom would be more revealing. Kate crept back in; Jane was still fast asleep but it was almost time for them to get up and she didn't feel comfortable looking around any more. She felt a little guilty for snooping as much as she had. It had been fun, though.

She put the coffee maker on and found two mugs, remembering that Jane liked her coffee strong and black. She leaned against the counter and looked out of the window while it brewed, letting the early morning sun warm her skin. She curled up her toes and smiled, stretching her arms above her head.

The coffee smelled thousands of times better than the stuff at the police headquarters; Kate poured it into the mugs and carried it carefully into the bedroom, where she found Jane awake, sitting up in bed. Jane grinned when she saw Kate and reached out to take the drink.

"I thought you might have left," she admitted, sipping her coffee. Kate sat down on the bed.

"No, not yet."

"Why were you up?"

"I haven't been up for long..." Kate didn't want to go into the story of her sleeping badly. Nightmares were things for children, not homicide detectives, and Jane might be her friend but she still wasn't going to admit to any weakness any time soon.

Jane reached up and touched her hair. "I have to shower. Want to join me?" She smiled wickedly; Kate matched her expression.

"Sure," she replied.

Jane had a nicer shower than Kate did; it was in a large cubicle which was a lot safer to stand in than a bath. They couldn't take too long, though.

Kate borrowed some of Jane's clothes. The companionable silence had returned; neither of them minded it but it was... strange. It wasn't that they didn't have anything to talk about, it was just that they both had a lot to think about, too.

Jane stayed in the car while Kate went to get her uniform and leave her dirty clothes at home. For once they weren't early; they arrived at work when everyone else was coming in and actually had to hurry to get changed. A case was called in which meant there was no need for conversation all day, but at the end of it they both went down to the gym.

"Were you going to come anyway or did you just decide to follow me?" Kate asked as she changed into tight lycra pants and a blue crop top. Jane winked.

"You'll never know. But it's good for you I came – you need a sparring partner anyway."

Kate considered pretending she hadn't wanted to do combat training, but it would have been a lie. Jane got changed quickly and met Kate on the mat, determined to do better than the last time they'd gone head to head. Kate could sense her frustration and power, but Kate was still the better fighter. Jane managed to win one round out of five, and she wasn't certain that Kate hadn't thrown the fight to make her feel better. She scowled as once again she lay dazed on the floor with Kate leaning over her.

"Don't worry," Kate said with a cheeky smile. "You're learning."

Jane had an idea. It was definitely cheating, but desperate times... Kate was straddling her; she ran her fingers up Kate's thigh, the skin tight material allowing her partner to feel everything. Kate hummed with anticipation. It had been a long day, she was tired and hot, she really needed to wind down... Jane continued the motion of her hand, brushing it between Kate's legs, her other hand now sneaking up to Kate's chest. Kate closed her eyes and relaxed-

And found herself flat on her back, pinned underneath Jane.

"Dammit Rizzoli, that's not fair," she growled.

"Always be on your guard," Jane teased, but she got up and pulled Kate up after her.

"Come on. Let's go back to mine."

Kate bit her lip, knowing Jane wouldn't like what she was about to say. She wasn't sure she liked it either, but something in her forced her to say it anyway.

"I think I'm gonna take a rain check," she said, looking around the room, anywhere but at Jane. "I've got some things to do at home, I want to go for a run... But tomorrow or something, yeah?"

Jane nodded, smiling, trying not to show how much she cared.

"No worries. I have things to do as well. Until tomorrow, Beckett."

Kate didn't shower, she just grabbed her stuff and left as quickly as possible. She had to walk home in the sun anyway-

"At least let me drive you."

She wasn't even a block away from the precinct.

"No, that's okay. I like walking."

Jane continued to drive alongside her.

"Come on. Your bag's huge. How did you get around last week? You can't lug that thing in on foot every day-"

"I have a bike."

"What, like with pedals?"

"No, like with an engine. But I'm fine walking. It's getting cooler, it's nice."

"Suit yourself," Jane called, pulling away. Kate watched the car disappear into the distance and wondered why she hadn't taken the lift. Her bag _was _heavy, she was tired, she liked Jane a lot, she liked being with her, she didn't even know for sure why she hadn't gone back to her place...

Half an hour later Kate shoved open the door to her building and started up the stairs. She was confused, so confused. This was just what she'd wanted to avoid! This kind of thing, these kinds of feelings... And when she felt like this she couldn't help thinking about her mother, about all the pain that was stored up around her. If she opened her heart it didn't just let in the good things. The darkness would come in too, and that couldn't happen.

Being in another city made no difference. Being away from her father, being away from the ghosts... There were fewer reminders, but the pain was no less. Perhaps she was just kidding herself, perhaps she would always be broken. Jane was great, Jane was fun... But while she seemed happy enough with the way things were, Kate was pushing her away already. She was a good person, she cared about things, and she was going to want more. Even if it wasn't a relationship, she was going to care... But Kate couldn't even cope with that.

She dumped her stuff in her apartment and went out again, returning after a short trip to the nearest liquor store. She poured herself a large glass of whiskey, not caring that it was barely 7pm. Seven wasn't even early, it was fine... She swallowed, relishing the burn in her throat as she tried not to think about the burn in her chest. Images flickered in her mind, images of a little girl, a happy little girl with a strong, powerful, loving mother.

It didn't stop. It didn't ever stop. Six years might as well have been six minutes for all the difference time made. Kate poured herself another glass. She told herself that this didn't make her like her father, but she knew in the back of her mind that she wasn't as far away from his state of mind as she pretended. Perhaps that was why she was so bad at helping him.

She was sitting on the floor; she stared up at the window at the setting sun outside, then threw her glass at the wall. It shattered; tears pouring down her cheeks she picked up the bottle and drank from that. It didn't take long before she began not to feel. She smiled as her brain clouded over, then wondered what to do next.

And then she saw her motorcycle helmet. She grinned, putting down the bottle. She found her leather jacket and boots, putting them on over her gym clothes, then shoved her keys into her pocket and stumbled out of the apartment. She was vaguely aware of her inebriation, but she was far past the point of caring. She needed to be outside, she needed to be moving. She couldn't be trapped any more, not in her mind, not in a room...

She pushed her bike out of the garage and kicked it into the action. She loved everything about it, the feel of it underneath her, the way she swayed with it as it moved, the feel of the wind on her face when she lifted her visor. The alcohol seemed to heighten her senses, and it made her braver, of course. She surged through the unfamiliar streets, swerving around cars, rushing past stop signs and red lights, letting the whole world become a blur-

* * *

A/N: Review!


	5. Chapter 5

I actually used this quote as the bio for an original fic that I put up, which I would also like you to read (fictionpress account with the same name as this one!), but I think it's appropriate for this too, so:

_Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within._ (James A Baldwin)

* * *

Kate slammed on the brakes but it was too late; she swerved to avoid the kid running across the street, her bike hit the kerb and she flew into the air. And it really was flying, for a few seconds she really was flying. And then she slammed into the ground, scraping along the road at at least 70mph, only slowing with the friction between her body and the tarmac. Her head was dragged along the ground; the skin of her legs was on fire until one final bump knocked her unconscious.

She woke up in hospital, wearing an itchy white gown, alone in a room that smelled like bleach. She blinked; her head felt really weird. Maybe it was the alcohol. Or maybe they'd given her something... She just lay there, waiting to see what would happen next.

It was less than ten minutes before a nurse came in.

"Good morning," the woman said brightly. "How are you feeling?"

"Uh... groggy," Kate said, blinking again in the light.

"You're a very brave woman, you know that?"

"I am?"

"You swerved, did all this to yourself, to save a kid running across the road. He gave a statement to the police, and he wants to pay to fix your bike."

"That won't be necessary-"

"You should accept his money. He seems loaded, and your bike was pretty smashed up."

"No, no..." Kate rubbed her temple. "No, I'll fix it myself. It wasn't his fault."

"It wasn't anyone else's."

Kate changed the subject. "When can I leave?"

"Well, we've bandaged you up pretty well. Your skin's pretty damaged, especially on your right leg, and you shouldn't work for a few days because of your head. But you can check out today if you want. You've had all you'll get of the good drugs – the painkillers we're giving you now you can get on prescription and take at home."

Kate tried to sit up. "In that case, I need to go now."

The nurse chuckled. "You're very eager. Remember, no work. And I need to take your details, of course. Do you have insurance? It's okay if you don't, the kid-"

"I have insurance. My name's Katherine Beckett, birthday November 17th 1979." She dragged herself out of bed, then looked at the gown.

"I'm afraid I really can't let you go unless you have someone to give you a lift."

"I'll call a cab."

"Someone needs to keep an eye on you, because of your head."

"Look, I'm fine! I just want to go home," Kate said exasperatedly.

"I'm sorry, it's hospital policy. I'll get you a phone, you can call someone."

The nurse left the room. Kate sat on the edge of the bed and yanked the IV out of her arm. The nurse came back with the cordless phone from the nurse's station.

"It can be anyone. Your mom, a friend..."

Kate sighed, then dialled her office at the precinct. Jane answered the phone.

"Rizzoli?"

"Beckett? Where the hell are you?"

"I... I need a favour. No questions asked."

Kate could feel Jane rolling her eyes. "What?"

"Come pick me up and take me home." The nurse glared at her. "And stay with me all day."

"What... Beckett, not that this doesn't sound fun," she muttered, "but you do realise I'm at work? At a job I want to keep?"

"Please. Make some excuse."

"Are you okay?"

"Jane."

The use of her first name changed Jane's mind. They never used first names. "Where are you?"

"All Saints Hospital."

"What are you doing there?"

"I said no questions!"

"I'll be there as soon as I can-"

"Oh, can you also bring me some clothes?"

"You're starting to scare me."

"Sorry."

"I'm on my way."

Jane arrived in half an hour. She handed Kate a Boston PD t-shirt and a pair of tracksuit bottoms, gaping at the bandages. Kate realised as she tried to get dressed that her hands were pretty mangled too. Wordlessly, Jane stepped in to help her, trying not to comment on the extensive injuries.

Kate wanted to walk out, but after a few steps she was forced to accept the offer of a wheelchair. Jane pushed it along the corridors; Kate held her head in her hands and wished she could disappear.

Neither of them said anything in the car. To Kate's surprise, Jane drove them back to her place.

"Look, you can just leave me at mine and go back to work."

"Not a chance. I'll call in and explain. What happened to you?"

"I... I crashed my bike. They've said it wasn't my fault, someone ran out into the road."

"You sound like you disagree."

"I was _drunk_, Rizzoli... I have no idea what happened."

"Why were you... Jeez."

"I'm so sorry. Thanks for coming to get me."

"No problem. I... You look awful. You're going to bed. I'll go pick up your painkillers from the drugstore, and phone in to work. Way to start your Boston career – you're going to need at least a week off. Probably more. You might have to retake your physical!"

"Dammit..."

"Beckett, are you... I mean, mentally..." Jane looked around awkwardly, wishing she didn't have to ask.

"I'm fine, Rizzoli," Kate said shortly. "I just did something stupid."

"Right. Good to know. You settle down, help yourself to anything... I'll take my cell, call me if you need me. I won't be more than an hour."

"I'll just sleep."

"I'll have to wake you up when I get back. The nurse said-"

"I know. That's okay."

Jane nodded, then left her apartment. Kate staggered to the bedroom and flopped down, yelling out in pain as she brushed her injured leg on the sheet. She adjusted herself so there was no pressure on it then closed her eyes, trying to ignore the pounding in her head.

Jane drove to the drugstore and handed them the prescription to make up. She signed for the pills, then called Korsak on her cell. She just said Kate had been in an accident, it hadn't been her fault, and that Kate didn't know anyone else in Boston so she would take the week's leave that she had coming up to look after her, if that was okay. Korsak didn't really have any choice but to agree.

Kate wasn't actually asleep when Jane got back; everything hurt too much for her to relax. Jane brought her some water to take some pills right away; she swallowed them gratefully. Jane sat on the edge of the bed; Kate leaned against the headboard with her eyes closed.

"Look," Jane began awkwardly. "You're all beat up right now and I'm not going to ask... But I'm gonna need an explanation eventually."

Kate bit her lip. "I'm so sorry," she said, opening her eyes. "You deserve so much better."

"Hey. We're just fucking, babe. I know you had to call me. It's not a problem. But I actually quite like you. So if something's up, as your friend, I want to know."

"I owe you that much..." Kate said.

"Yeah. You do."

"Thanks for coming."

"I was hardly going to leave you there."

"You could have."

"You wouldn't have left me, would you?"

Kate smiled and shook her head.

"I'm sor-"

"No. No more apologising."

"I was an idiot, Rizzoli. I _am _an idiot. A stupid, messed up idiot. You shouldn't have to look after me like this."

Jane shrugged. "At least you're not boring."

Kate laughed. "I kind of wish I were boring."

"I don't. I like how you are. You'd probably be a lot worse in bed if you weren't so damaged."

"Now that's just fucked up."

"Sorry. It was a bit kinky, wasn't it..."

They were both laughing now. Kate handed Jane her glass and lay back in the bed.

"Everything hurts," she said quietly. Jane stroked her hair.

"Such a shame. You're not going to feel like sex for... days."

Kate attempted a cheeky smile. "You never know."

"Come off it, invalid. Your hands are covered in bandages."

"I'm sure I'll be able to figure something out. When I'm not so tired..." she trailed off, the pills already sending her to sleep. Jane smiled, watching as her friend slipped into a deep sleep. But the brave, happy face Kate put on while she was awake didn't stay. Her guard went down and for the first time, Jane saw the _pain_, the raw, horrifying pain, that this woman felt every second of every minute of every day. But...

"You're not alone any more."

She didn't know why she said it. She didn't know what it meant, she didn't know why it meant anything. But the words escaped her lips before she could properly consider them... Perhaps they didn't matter. No one heard them but her. But there was something about them, something about how she felt when she said them. They were a promise. And they weren't just a promise to Kate.

* * *

A/N: Please review. X


	6. Chapter 6

6

Kate woke up in the dark, aching all over. Jane was asleep beside her, so peaceful and kind. Jane always wore her game face to work, and even most of the rest of the time, but her softness was betrayed while she slept. Kate liked it, she liked it so much, but it was also what made her struggle out of bed and limp down the stairs. She called herself a cab and went home to lie alone on her uneven mattress in her grotty apartment. She didn't sleep but she could blame the pain for that. She watched the night through the window, the stars in the sky. It hadn't been that late when she left Jane's; the night seemed to last forever. The physical pain turned into a welcome distraction, especially when she started to think about how Jane would feel when she woke up.

She'd done it, she'd done it already. She'd gotten attached, she cared, and it could only end badly. She could only hurt Jane, there was no alternative. None. Only whole people could love. Only people who felt, only people who could be people, people who had it in them to care, people who weren't broken and messy and dark...

"I'm not a person," Kate whispered to herself in the dark. "I can't be her person."

Jane wasn't surprised to wake up to an empty bed. She was worried, but she wasn't surprised. She didn't call; Kate would be fine. She understood. She would do the same. But she wished Kate could see that she wanted to help... She would be there, if she was wanted. She had love to give... Perhaps she could help. But Kate wasn't ready. Kate was broken, hurting, alone... And she wasn't the sort of person to accept help from anyone. She wasn't the sort of person to trust anyone. Jane had seen the agony flashing across Kate's face... Kate wasn't ready to let anyone in.

Kate spent the next 24 hours alone. There was nothing to do, no one to call... Her body hurt all over; she was happy enough to stay in bed. But after a day, she needed to get up, get out! She staggered to the bathroom and ran some water into the bath. She couldn't wash properly because of the bandages; she stripped off with some difficulty, and wondered how to clean herself without getting her hands wet. She hadn't been able to properly go to the toilet; she blushed just thinking about it. She'd only need the bandages for another day, but still...

Her cell phone buzzed. She looked at it – it was Jane. She answered; she was stuck.

"Hi. I'm just offering you help, I figured with your bandages things might be hard, and I'm probably the only person in Boston who's seen you naked."

Kate laughed. "You're not, actually. At least, you're not the only person who's seen me naked in Boston."

"Your wordplay confuses me, but I take it you mean... Wow. You get busy."

"If I ask you for help..." Kate trailed off, not sure how to say what she meant.

"It doesn't mean anything. Beckett, I'm offering, as a friend, to help you out a bit. It doesn't mean anything."

"Then... please come over. I'm standing in my bathroom with no idea what to do."

Jane chuckled. "I'll be right there."

Jane drove through the streets; it was dusk and the traffic was light. She made it in ten minutes. Kate buzzed her in, not bothering to put clothes on. It was too difficult and painful, and she would only be taking them off again. Jane contained her surprise when she found Kate completely naked, then simply led her to the bathroom. She narrowed her eyebrows.

"You should probably sit on the edge of the bath," she said in the end. "But with the leg with the big bandage on the outside."

Kate couldn't help giggling as she positioned herself as instructed. Jane laughed a little too.

"If you weren't so banged up, this would be kind of hot."

Kate put her hand on Jane's shoulder to steady herself. "You can fantasise later. Right now, just help me get clean?"

Jane winked, then ran a basin full of warm water and got to work. She was careful, not wanting to disturb any of Kate's bruises. Kate blushed as she felt her nipples tighten with arousal. Jane kissed her on the cheek.

"Maybe later," she said softly. That didn't help _at all_.

Jane took Kate's towel off the rail and patted her dry, then asked where she could find a bathrobe."

"I don't have one," Kate admitted.

"What do you have?"

"Uhm... A shirt?"

Jane laughed. "And I thought I was bad. Can I just look for something?"

Kate was sitting on the toilet lid now. "Knock yourself out."

"I think you've done enough of that for the both of us, at least for this week."

She left and went into the bedroom, shocked that Kate's closet was even barer than hers. She liked the underwear drawer, though. She found a man's cotton buttondown and took that back to the bathroom along with some underwear.

Kate let Jane help her into them.

"I should wash your hair," Jane commented. Kate sighed.

"Yeah..."

"Sit on the floor, look..." Jane brought a cushion from the couch, put Kate's towel around her shoulders, and had her sit on the cushion at the side of the bath, using the shower head to wet and rinse her hair. Kate smiled at Jane's touch, almost relaxing as she closed her eyes and tried to simply feel the companionship.

"All done," Jane said quietly. Kate sat up and looked into the eyes that were facing her.

"Thanks," she replied.

"I think you need sleep," Jane said gently. "And I'm pretty sure it isn't within your boundaries, but if you want, I'll stay with you. No strings attached."

"I-"

Jane put her finger to Kate's lips.

"You don't always have to be so strong."

"But I can't... I can't be who you want me to be."

"I don't want you to be anything. Come on."

Jane helped Kate to her feet and took her through to the bedroom. Kate was too tired to argue. She could think of so many reasons why this was a bad idea but Jane was making it so easy... So easy to give up, to not think, to take the risk...

Kate was asleep within minutes, and Jane found it easy to fall asleep beside her despite the awful bed. They both slept until morning. Jane woke up first and went to make coffee, smiling as she explored Kate's kitchen. It contained coffee. And nothing else.

Kate was awake when she came back into the bedroom.

"How are you?" Jane asked.

"I'm... good. Hurts less than yesterday."

"I'm glad to hear it. What do you want to do today?"

Kate bit her lip in thought, then smiled.

"Do you know anything about motorcycles?"

An hour later they were down in the basement, covered in grease, with Kate's Harley in pieces around them. Some parts could be salvaged, others would have to be completely replaced. They made a list of what they had to buy, then Jane drove them to the best shop she knew.

There were at least 3 day's work – 3 days which Kate thought might be close to the best 3 days of her adult life. She'd forgotten what it was like to have a friend, someone to put a blob of grease on your nose or steal your fries when you were eating... Jane called Frankie, who was only too keen to come over and help. He was more enthusiastic than skilful, but he turned out to be pretty good with a soldering iron, and fantastic at collecting food. He could wangle free stuff from anywhere.

Once the bike was fixed they moved on to board games, card games, magazines, scenic drives, TV and movies... Kate had never had a better holiday, and Jane didn't regret taking her vacation days at all.

When Kate was finally ready for work again, though, they weren't disappointed. Jane drove her in; she'd been sort of living at Kate's, which was much more enjoyable now she'd stocked the fridge and taken Kate mattress shopping. They hadn't talked about the arrangement, it had just sort of happened. Kate was trying not to think about it; Jane could tell.

Jane wasn't really sure how she felt about it. She wanted more, she couldn't deny it, but Kate was so closed off... For now, bringing a smile to her face was enough. It had to be; there was nothing else available.

Kate could see Jane's frustration. Jane hid it well, but there were moments when it appeared. Kate didn't know how to fix it... She wanted to, she really did, but she wasn't ready. She was also terrified. If she went over everything again she would have to think about it again, she would have to feel it again. And what if it was too much? What if she was too messed up? What if she scared Jane away?

* * *

A/N: Please review! This might be the last update for a few days but you never know - I have loads to do but if you beg me enough I might write faster. X


End file.
